Blowin' in the Wind

So in celebration of my upcoming RoMO trip, I am going to share some quotes that have been said in that most absurd of towns...

me: Shellie loves the circle flash.
Shel: I do! The only thing I love more is biscuits and gravy.

E Rocka: "How many handles of Congress does it take to kill a baby?"

E Rocka: Wait. I can see you! That seems wrong.
T Pain: You're trying on sunglasses, not a blindfold.

E Rocka: Mickey, what's all this stuff? Dirt? What is this?
Mickey (slurred): I dunno. A weather report?

Anna: "Smoking seeds causes infidelity"

NB: "They're making a new Passion of the Christ..."
E Rocka: "Does he live?"

HC: "Cats are like sixteen year old girls. If you ignore them and treat them badly, then they love you."

E Rocka: "I can't come out today...I'm wearing my math panties."

E Rocka: "That makes me wonder what happened to my brother's friend Crackhead Ted. He got fired because he used to skip work too much to go to Cubs games."
A Cash: "That would be my dream."
E Rocka: "To get fired & become a crackhead?!"

everyone: "We're an imaginary bluegrass band....and we're excellent!!!!"

Mickey: "Well, I don't know! I've never had to call Dysfunctional Family Services before!"

E Rocka: "It doesn't matter what you look like as long as you like to drink beer."

Bob: "Those are all words. ... But when you put them together, they make no sense."

E Rocka: "What does it say?"
Mickey holds up a sign - 'LBC meeting in the bassment'
E Rocka & I: "Bassment?! Mickey that's not how you spell basement!"
Mickey: "That's how it's spelled on BET!"

T Pain: "Was that Braydon or the wind??"

Me: "I just put on the cheese."

T Rumble: "This is your life. Welcome to it. Drink a beer."

me: "Are we riding you home?"

I am starting to love my job again, which is nice, now that we have a new IE. We'll call him Ralph, since that's how I introduced him to everyone. At first I was not a fan - he is one of those overly happy people, and he always uses 2 greetings when I see him (e.g. "Hi! Good morning!"). While I am all for people being happy and polite and friendly, this was just too much. Now that he's been here for a couple weeks surrounded by a normal level of happiness, his has started to turn into something far more tolerable. Now I just need to get him to walk a tad slower, and life is good.

This weekend was a pretty good one. We went to the wedding on Saturday, where my mother proceeded to get extremely drunk. It was amusing at first, and then a tad stressful, but I got enough pictures and videos to make it worth it. :) To be fair, it was the most amazing open bar I had ever seen. We were drinking liquor that isn't even out on the market yet (Captain Morgan 100 proof = wonderful), there was Los Cazadores tequila, a Jagerator and a bunch of Monster (I hate Jager bombs), and a bunch of premixed shots & drinks (margaritas - lime & strawberry, Rum Runner, Cosmos, the list goes on). The wedding was very nice, and the reception was a lot of fun. I suppose it was everything a wedding should be.

Sunday we spent the day working on the grandparents' house. What I refer to as 'Estate Sale Vol. 1' is this weekend. It amazes me the amount of stuff we are selling; I'm not entirely sure how it all fit in the house. Perhaps my grandparents were magicians. They were pretty damn amazing, I wouldn't put it past them. My uncle decided he wants to sell hot dogs & the such so that he is out of our way but still helping - good call. :) I am in charge of making signs - so many signs - 'Keep children attended at all times', 'Not responsible for personal loss or injury', 'All prices negotiable', 'Mobility equipment available - inquire if interested', 'Please buy everything', 'Hot dogs & blow jobs available in back'. Sigh.

While in theory this is all a great idea, I am afraid to see how we will react when people start carrying our beloved family's belongings out with them after giving us a measly dollar. I imagine it will go something like this: "You take care of that ashtray. My grandfather spent YEARS getting emphysema with it. You don't know what a good deal you're getting for 10 cents - It's already been broken in for you and everything!" and then crying. I guess we'll see. If that doesn't happen, I'd say the odds of my crazy aunt showing up and causing a scene are pretty high.

My cell phone's internal speaker inexplicably stopped working this weekend. My options were to have all of my conversations on speakerphone, or use a ghetto backup phone I happened to have. I opted for the latter, although I am starting to wish I hadn't. Sometimes when I open the phone the screen is blue, so I have to keep closing it and opening it, or bend the top back to see anything. Anyway I ordered a new phone Monday night and it should be to me hopefully by this weekend, early next week at the latest. It should be the bomb, but I'll let you know when I get it.

In other news, I have poison ivy. Many of you might already know that this happens to me fairly often, like every time I am downwind of it. The strange thing is that when it first started showing up, it was just all over my ass and inside my bellybutton. Not sure about that!

It hurts. Oh my.

How can the entire bottle be gone and why was I woke up at 4:30 in the morning? Furthermore, why was I asleep in the bathtub?! My fingers were still pruny on the way to work this morning. McDonald's breakfast has never tasted so good. Totally worth being 10 minutes late.




I've been wasting a lot of time playing this game today.

Update - 3 pm, and the urge to vomit is overwhelming. I finally decide to succumb to it, right as all the associates go on break. I go in the bathroom, and there is a woman on the phone in there who will not go away. I hate her.

Update - McDonald's breakfast not so tasty on the way out. Is it time to go home yet?!